I had the pleasure of meeting Austin through my daughter, Aenea. It has always felt like I knew him better than I did because Aenea always talked about him with great enthusiasm and joy ever since they met during their first year at the U of C. We did go out to dinner and enjoyed a wonderful meal of very interesting northern Thai food (unlike anything I have eaten) and shared some concerts. The wordplay was non-stop and I left feeling that I had met a long-lost family member. I wish that I was not remembering Austin and I know that Gregg, Laurie, Aidain and all of his friends and family must share that wish. My thoughts are with you at a very difficult time.
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How to write words that convey the shock and hurt from knowing that Austin is gone. There isn’t much that words can do – but at the very least maybe they can give witness and honor to him.
I know Austin mostly from when he was young. I did not see him often in his teenage years, but only when my travels took me to Albuquerque and an overnight stay with the Hudson-LaPores. More often, I would keep up-to-date with Austin’s parents – the usual “checking in” between friends. There are not that many people on this planet with a mind for numbers, statistics, geography, chemistry and biology. Very few indeed. I would count Austin among this rare group. Even as a little guy, Austin was “keeping track”. Charting baseball stats, race car stats, geography … I think he knew the capitals of all the states in the U.S. as a toddler! If I am exaggerating – it is not by much. His mind was a sponge for facts and numbers and unlike the rest of us – there was no leakage – he kept track of data long term. The older I get, the more appreciative I am of this impressive talent. But brilliance by itself is not the special thing. In my opinion, what made Austin stand out was that he had these gifts of brilliance and in equal measure, kindness, openness and gentleness. It is one thing to collect facts and stats and remember them for a test or a project. But it is another to be curious about the facts, to communicate them to friends or students, and to care about the people around you. Again, my most frequent interactions were when he was younger, but I am pretty sure the openness, caring and gentle parts of his personality continued to define him as a college student. One small, little, and seemingly insignificant memory I have of Austin is on a mid-week school morning. Everyone is milling about in the kitchen. I have just flown in for some scientific meeting and am jet lagged. I join the adults in a mission to seek out kitchen-coffee and its special properties and Austin and Aidan are putting their school lunch boxes together. Austin wasn’t particularly with the program that morning. He was a little wanting in the department of organization, being more interested in this and that (I think at this point it was maps). His patient parents issued gentle, but urgent herding behaviors to get him to refrigerator-forage his lunch box together – something about peas – did Austin love peas as a kid? That would be unusual – but not surprising. I don’t remember anymore (see aforementioned “leakage” above), so there isn’t much else to tell; time has worn off the edges of everything else that happened that morning. But I just remember this as a practical family moment trying to get Austin out the door to school. And I remember his reaction as a bit dreamy and gentle, and his family as loving and warm. I met Austin in 1994, when he was just coming up to three. My sister Emily was his nanny and Gregg & Laurie kindly let me come to stay for 2 weeks as I missed my sister so much.
I was only 14 and didn't have much experience with infants, but Austin was such a joy to be around. Even at that young age he was able to communicate what he wanted/needed so well, I remember being out at a pizza place for lunch and he started saying "Co?", Gregg instantly knew that he wanted some Cola! His love of weather even at that young age was clear. I remember he introduced me to the Weather Channel, and we would sit together and watch it while Emily got on with things. I was as memorised as he was by it (coming from a small, wet island like GB, the vast differences in the weather across 1 country astounded me). As I left to go home again, I hoped I would be able to come and look after Austin when I was old enough, as I had loved my time with the Hudson-Lapore family. Sadly I never had the courage to do it. I got to meet him and his wonderful family again in 2000 when Emily and I went to stay with them in NM. He was so very bright, articulate and polite. His knowledge of science astounded me! Gregg, Laurie and Aidan, I am so sorry for your loss. You are an amazing family and I am so pleased I met all of you. Austin certainly made a positive impact on my life. I was Austin's nanny from 14 months to 27 months, I can remember holding him sleeping in my arms as if it were yesterday.
I haven't shared a story before, because I haven't known which one to start with but now I know it is important just to start... and there will be more to come. Also whenever I sit down to write or post my pictures there is someone who needs me. Those are two things that Austin's loss have really made me realise... not to put things off because I don't know how to achieve them perfectly... and how important all relationships are; they are what make up our lives. It is clear from my own knowledge of Austin and his family, but also of the stories here (and the number of people who have visited the site) that Austin's life although tragically cut short at the cusp of his adulthood, IT WAS AND IS infinate: 1) In it's richness, his intellect, his enthusiasm for life, his completely unmarred confidence and character and the complete and utter bond of love and mutual support he shared with his family. 2) In the effect that his loss has had on all the people who knew him, AND, with no less importance, those who didn't know him in life but have been moved and given pause for thought in all these stories. 3) His life has the capacity to be an great influence for good in the world, although not in the way that we all imagined. Anyway, a story, TRUCKS When I arrived Austin had words, many, but the sort of words that all have three letters and sound the same except to his mother and father and those extremely intimate with him. Quickly I discovered he knew and was extemely animated by all the various types of truck and vehicle in his toy collection and the ones we saw on the streets. And I got to know the complexity behind what to the unpractised ear would be babble. So there was 'duu' (dump truck) 'cru' (crane) 'pii' (pick-up truck)... anyway you get the picture. He carried several trucks everywhere. Maybe not so unusual for a small boy. One of Gregg and Laurie's first purchases when I arrived was a folding set of steps (I am somewhat vertically challenged!) He began to spend large amounts of time running backwards and forwards from the living room where his trucks were kept and arranging the trucks on the tiers of the steps, EXTREMELY carefully and with the animation and concentration on his face that many people have mentioned in their stories. Now Austin was not, as far as I know, what we in England call a petrolhead (obsessed with cars and speed and flashyness). He was teaching himself at 1 1/2 classification. He used the objects around him that were most suited, because there were lots of them of different sorts, and they could be sorted in different ways, by number of wheels, by colour, by accessory etc etc Greg, Laurie, and Aidan,
Gil, Julia, Jacob, and I are so saddened to hear of Austin’s death and are still in a state of shock about it. When I think of this as the worst possible thing to happen, losing a child/brother, and what you must be going through right now, I feel physically ill. Some years ago I learned from a dear friend who had lost her only child, a teenage girl of 15, in an automobile accident, that one never forgets the trauma, but that with time people become able to live their lives again. I also learned that although memories can painfully remind us of our loss, with time they can become a great source of peace. I am so thankful that you were able to make so many wonderful memories together as a family. I feel privileged to have been able to share some time with Austin on his life’s journey. Actually, journeying to and from Albuquerque Academy every day for about 6 years was an amazing opportunity for me to see your beautiful son grow to manhood. Thank you for trusting me to get him safely to and from school during those years. My memories of him will always be of those years, from the serious, kind, and energetic young sixth grader with his rolling backpack racing to class everyday with an enthusiasm for life that made him stand out from his peers, to the thoughtful, quiet young ninth grader dressed in his Copernicus costume for Medieval Day activities at school. I loved that Austin chose to play cello; and I secretly took pride in the fact that, after Jacob joined the carpool, I was probably the only parent/driver with two cellos stuffed in the back of her car. I delighted in the car conversations – with Austin in the car you could bet that the conversation stayed focused and rational; however, I never ever heard him say an unkind word to anyone. And the other students in the car became confident over time that they would always be adequately clothed for whatever weather came their way because they only had to consult with Austin to know what lay in store for them. It was a pleasure to watch Austin excel academically in everything he undertook, but most especially in science, where he had the opportunity to revel in scientific facts with like-minded friends and be a member of one of the most amazing Science Bowl teams Academy has ever had. One day during his Junior year in high school, when he happened to be the only student riding home, he had his humanities book laying open in his lap. I asked him what he thought of the subject matter, and he said he found it “interesting.” Since it had crossed my mind that Austin would probably be responsible for some great scientific discovery someday, the educator in me commented that I thought it was important that scientists possess a thorough understanding of human culture and history. Austin was respectfully quiet as I talked and I knew he was giving my comments due consideration. I believe that even at age 16 he understood the importance of the scientist’s role in human society. He was that sophisticated and mature. And so as I have reflected with a heavy heart on the loss of Austin, his goodness, his potential, and after hearing what he has meant to his family and friends, I have come to realize that Austin has left behind something far more important and profound than any scientific discovery. Austin has left us a model of a life well-lived. He has shown us how to be fully engaged and joyous in life. I hope to pay tribute to his memory by trying to learn and live in this way. I am so thankful to have known Austin! I first met Austin because he was a TA for a science class I took. I didn't mean any offense to the teacher, but I was pretty sure I learned more from Austin than from the actual teacher. He seemed much more accessible and willing to answer my questions, even though some of them were probably silly to him. Austin was a lot of the reason why I looked forward to that class and why I now love science as much as he did.
I didn't have to know him outside of the scientific realm to know that he was an intelligent and kind person, though I wish I did. Rest in peace, Austin, and know that you won't be forgotten among your family and friends. It is now a week since I received the news that I was dreading. I have been so incredibly sad, but the stories and memories I have read here have been an enormous comfort to me.
I was 'Au-pair no. 4', following in the footsteps of Jo, Emily and Heather. The year was 1995, Austin was 3 and Aidan 1. We all struck gold the day the Hudson-Lapore family chose us to be a part of their family. I have so many happy memories of Austin and my year in Chicago. I had a routine for washing the kids clothes/bedding and there were 2 laundry baskets in the bedroom. I used them to separate dark and light washing. I remember discussing this with Austin and he would help me sort the laundry. One day he shouted to me to come to the bedroom as he was puzzled about which basket to put his navy and white striped top. We had to sit down and wonder whether to put it in a dark or light wash and what the outcome would be. So curious and scientific even at 3! I also remember the day Laurie shouted to me 'What have you done to my son!' I had a moment of horror before I realised she was laughing - Austin had just told her off for not separating the laundry into the correct baskets! Did my laundry training stay with him over the years I wonder! A small memory but one I often smile about whilst doing the mundane task of laundry X We started off our first year together and your room was right down the hall. You were always kind and friendly and my thoughts and prayers go out to your family. You will be missed. RIP Austin.
I had a great time with you on the OAC mathissen trip and from that trip it was evident that you loved anything and everything about the outdoors. You will me missed so much Austin. I only met you on that one OAC trip but still I'm glad I did. There is a really good poem about death and nature that I think applies here and hopefully it will provide some comfort for others though I cannot remember the author of it:
Do not stand at my grave and weep I am not there; I do not sleep. I am a thousand winds that blow, I am the diamond glints on snow, I am the sun on ripened grain, I am the gentle autumn rain. When you awaken in the morning's hush I am the swift uplifting rush Of quiet birds in circling flight. I am the soft starlight at night. Do not stand at my grave and cry, I am not there; I did not die. Austin, I'm sitting here wishing this wasn't true. They had to have made a mistake. Someone with such a passion for life can't be gone already. It's not fair. You were undoubtedly one of the sweetest people I've ever met. Always with a helping hand (aka saving my ass while caving!) or with a kind word or with adventurous photo shoots, hahaha. I refuse to accept that you won't be on the next OAC trip I go on 'cause it just seems wrong, unfair. Rest in peace, my friend, thank you for everything you've done for me. I hope you're out there adventuring.
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AuthorCollecting stories so that everyone can see who Austin Hudson-Lapore was to each of us. Archives
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